A Mid-Summer Night's Post

So it isn't exactly the middle of "summer", and it's not exactly night right now (more like early-early-early morning), but nevertheless I'm writing a post for one reason or another. Kara asked me the other night when we were talking why I posted so late, and I just told her that I write when the mood strikes me. I don't know why the mood strikes me at such a time during the day, when practically 99.9% of the people in this town are probably asleep. I guess that's why... the solitude of having this blinking cursor in front of me whilst sitting in this room lit only by the brightness of my computer monitor - engulfed in the darkness that wants to swallow me up, but the light and "click-clack" sounds that my keyboard makes pushes it back.

So how's this summer going? Well, whenever I run into people and they ask me "how's your summer going?" I have to give them an answer. But I think I've just come up with the most accurate answer just now, and that is: this summer has been fair. What does "fair" mean? Well, that means it's been pretty much what I've expected, with nothing out of the ordinary that makes me exclaim that it's been good nor bad, neither exciting or boring. I've worked a good amount, but that was to be expected, as I need to save up some cash as well as pay off some bills and buy myself some things. It's been pretty relaxing there, just hanging out and getting paid... even the Saturday night that I had to work along by myself wasn't the worst it's been. I can't complain about my shifts so far.

Other than that, I can probably list everything else I've done on 1 hand. I've gone to Pint Night with Derek and Julian at Downtown Brew once, and watched the World Cup there once too (at 7 AM mind you, for "kegs and eggs"). That was a blast. Then I've basically hung out at home with my dear pup, something I didn't get to do as much when school was in session. It just feels good to not have to worry about any academic obligations when I go to bed at night, but rather just what time I have to wake up to get to work by. I want to go to beach, Will's already taken Apollo once. I've gotten my car washed... finally. Wow that's one of the exciting things I've done this summer? Pathetic. Hunter, Jeff, D, and Brian are around this summer, I'll definetly be hanging out with those guys sooner or later - especially after Brian gets back into town.

I think I've figured out why the "mood" strikes me to write this late at night... it's more of just when I actually feel tired that I feel like writing, because I've noticed that right before I fall asleep (or as I attempt to fall asleep in bed), my brain kind of goes into a pre-dream mode where things and ideas still sort of make practical sense in my head. The only thing about it is, while these thoughts and ideas formulate in my head and I'm conscious of it (thus able to remember it), the next morning when I think back on those exact things, I realize how rediculous, far-stretched, or un-practical those ideas turned out to be! Thus I've come to the conclusion and have to constantly remind myself that whatever I think about while lying in bed, despite how awake or conscious I feel myself to be still, can't be put into action until the next morning after I wake up and can think with a clear, rested mind. I have yet to prove my own theory wrong (in other words, acted on a thought I had formulated before I fell asleep and have it turn out correctly or the way I intended it to). I know all this seems to jumble together, and maybe I'm in that state right now, but it makes sense to me, and I've thought about this during daytime too. So it's kind of like this: while I may be in that slightly unconscious, unrational state while I write this, it's simply a repeat of something I have formulated under stable conditions regarding such a state - therefore it is valid. Wow, isn't this fun? This really IS "subconscious" rambling, hence the title of my blog...

... b e d t i m e.