Wanted: Remote Control of Life
I sometimes really wish that life was a TV show... not so much that things are scripted, but the fact that it is broadcast and can be recorded, rewound, edited, or redone.
I wish I had the rewind button to life.
If only there was a way, to go back in time - even just rewind back 10 seconds - so that you can get a second opportunity to react in a different manner or to say the thing that was on the tip of your tongue but never got the guts to say out loud. I wish I had those opportunities today. In a span of about 20 minutes, three of those moments came and passed... and if you know me, I'm going to be replaying those moments over and over and over in my head like a broken record player - each time imagining a different situation/outcome had I just acted, looked, said, or done something... ANYTHING.
But what did I do? I'll give you 3 guesses, and the first 2 don't count... that's right, I did: NOTHING. I kept my mouth shut, let the moment walk/pass right by me, and continued about my own business while pretending not to have broken my stride.
If these events were indeed like that of a TV show and the director knew in advance that a moment like this was to come about... the television viewers at home would be able to watch me in the following fashion: the moment would approach, and the camera would focus in on my eyes as I first realized the moment, acknowledged it, and then desperately search for the other person to make the first move. Then as the camera zooms back out and the moment passes, the viewers would see me go about my business as if nothing had never even happened. This is all what they would see.
What would they hear? Most likely an internal monologue, in which my own narration in my head starts out with all the hope in the world and excitement that such an event had occurred in my day. But as the moment comes and goes and gets ruined by - NOTHING - I begin to torture myself with the infinite possibilities displayed in a broken record player fashion in my head.
I really wish I had the rewind button... that, or I wish I had the money to see a shrink or psychiatrist to figure out how to stop torturing myself and damaging my self-esteem any further than it already is.
I sometimes really wish that life was a TV show... not so much that things are scripted, but the fact that it is broadcast and can be recorded, rewound, edited, or redone.
I wish I had the rewind button to life.
If only there was a way, to go back in time - even just rewind back 10 seconds - so that you can get a second opportunity to react in a different manner or to say the thing that was on the tip of your tongue but never got the guts to say out loud. I wish I had those opportunities today. In a span of about 20 minutes, three of those moments came and passed... and if you know me, I'm going to be replaying those moments over and over and over in my head like a broken record player - each time imagining a different situation/outcome had I just acted, looked, said, or done something... ANYTHING.
But what did I do? I'll give you 3 guesses, and the first 2 don't count... that's right, I did: NOTHING. I kept my mouth shut, let the moment walk/pass right by me, and continued about my own business while pretending not to have broken my stride.
If these events were indeed like that of a TV show and the director knew in advance that a moment like this was to come about... the television viewers at home would be able to watch me in the following fashion: the moment would approach, and the camera would focus in on my eyes as I first realized the moment, acknowledged it, and then desperately search for the other person to make the first move. Then as the camera zooms back out and the moment passes, the viewers would see me go about my business as if nothing had never even happened. This is all what they would see.
What would they hear? Most likely an internal monologue, in which my own narration in my head starts out with all the hope in the world and excitement that such an event had occurred in my day. But as the moment comes and goes and gets ruined by - NOTHING - I begin to torture myself with the infinite possibilities displayed in a broken record player fashion in my head.
I really wish I had the rewind button... that, or I wish I had the money to see a shrink or psychiatrist to figure out how to stop torturing myself and damaging my self-esteem any further than it already is.
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